The Black and White Demon on the Front Stoop.

I bet you are asking yourself, "Just HOW sleep deprived is she now?"  Oh, my friend, I am extremely sleep deprived, but that is completely besides the point!  I am at war with a new skunk!  I know it is a new skunk, because I took care of last years skunks!  

So this evil little creation has absolutely NO FEAR OF ME!  Oh you heard me right!  The first time he and I had a face-off, I was completely unaware that any skunk would even DARE step foot on this sacred, skunk-free farm.  I was walking out to check on the ducks and bring them some bread and there he was!  That black and white demon was on the front stoop!  He was eating the cat food, and our little bastard kittens were watching!  I hurriedly rushed back inside, and he just kept on eating.  I flickered the outside light off and on, and he just kept on eating.  I knocked on the window, and he just kept on eating.  Finally, irate, I slammed the front door as hard as I could!  He ran off, leaving the slight scent of damnation behind him and I won that round!

Ultimately waking up Bo and Cote.

Since then I have been trying to catch him in the act again.  Do I plan on shooting him?  No.  I would miss.  Do I plan on scaring the tar out of him?  Affirmative.  I keep waiting to see if it goes after my chickens in the meantime. 

No one messes with my chickens.

Last year it was a war zone here at our farm due to the skunks.  No one had lived here for many years, so they sort of thought they owned the place.  No kidding, we had one I actually thought was a dog.  Wonder where the deer went in Skime?  The skunks that lived at our farm ate them!  You couldn't step outside past 8:00pm because there would be half a dozen skunks roaming around.  People would drop by and have to run to the front door!  

One night Keith and my brother Mitchel decided that they were going to post outside and clear them out.  Keith lured them in with leftovers in various places and then they used ladders as hunting stands.  For HOURS those two goonballs sat outside and finally they got a couple.  One was nailed right in front of the house though, and it made the entire interior, exterior and my van stink for about 2 weeks!  The next morning I got up and went outside and I saw that Keith had lured them in with leftovers put in my NICE baking dishes!  Nice baking dishes now filled with bullet holes!!!

So tonight, I decided I was going to hurry and snag the cat dishes before the skunk arrived; TOO LATE!  That little spawn looked me in the eye, sneered, and then hightailed it!  He is so lucky my running shoes weren't nearby, because I so would have karate jumped him!

Sometimes I think that living here has set me up for some sort of cosmic joke.  The last year has been a bit of a cross between the movie "Funny Farm" and the show "Green Acres".  I am pretty sure that if there were higher powers involved, they are having a "LOFLMFAOTIPO" over the day to day scenario's here!

The only thing that is stopping me from setting up the deer cam's pointed at my house is the fact that I would probably try and set up some sort of ridiculous booby trap next.

This is not the last you will be hearing about my arch nemesis, and am pretty sure he will be playing mind games with me for weeks to come.