Today I am Thankful that I was chosen to be the mother of my three gorgeous kiddo's. There have been times I have asked myself why it was me that I was chosen... when I struggle with stress weight I cannot shed, when I see our light bank account, when I look at myself in the mirror and I look 48 rather than 28, when my body is so sore I can't bend. Then I realize I am fluffy because the kids like to cuddle my squishyness... I have had to fill my gas tank at least twice a week so I can bring the kids to therapies and classes.... most of the cracks on my face are laugh lines... and I still am able to carry my babies around; something I won't get to do for much longer.
I am not a perfect mom, but we laugh all day long. We cuddle, we veg, we play, we read, and get to our appointments, and do learning activities. I truly enjoy hanging out with my kids and doing stuff with them, as they are three of the best things that have ever happened to me. Being a parent has been not just rewarding, but a blast! The kids rotate turns to go shopping with me. Even if they are naughty, we have a good time. No lie though, I usually walk out of the store feeling like one of my lives has been scraped off.
Our schedule is insane, but we try our best to keep it organized. There is never enough hours in the day, but the kids have taught me to loosen up as there is always tomorrow. I am really unorganized, but I keep trying to be better. I haven't given up yet. We are about to start hockey in our house so give me a couple of weeks, and see if I even have any hair left.
We do not have a diagnosis for Bo and Cote, and with the suggestion of our Doctor, we have not been looking for one for over 2 years. We don't need one, as it is not who the kids are. What the kids need in order to survive are love from family and friends, therapies, life skills, learning activities and tons of playtime. I am the sort of person who can and will do these things with fervor.
Gage needed me to step up to the plate and Homeschool him, so I have. I do not have a teaching degree, but I research every single day which methods will be best for him. He is not the happiest about being Homeschooled, but every time we start our lessons or go to town and his SPD flares, I know in my heart it was the best decision. I have caught a lot of flack from him, family and friends about Homeschooling, but I have stood my ground. I see how far he has come educationally in just a couple of months, and the decision is made valid. The strides in his education come with a price as his SPD has been a bit out of control, but we keep right on trucking through it. We are in the midst of looking into a service dog for him and Bo, so that may just be the ticket for helping in amped up situations. He is a good kid though, with great manners, and sociable personality and very lovable I am a lucky mom.
The kids have taught me Patience by the boatloads. Determination as we set our sights on a goal. Stubbornness when they think they can weasel out of doing something. Confidence as I walk with my children in public settings. Strength as I fight for my childrens well being and rights. Compassion as I attempt to guess how best to help them next. Joy when I here Mom, Mama, or anything that sounds remotely like it. Endearment when someone walks up to the children and talks to them. Pride when I see someone won over by them. Exuberance when they are befriended in any way. LOVE when I set my eyes upon them or hear their little voices.
I was not always the type of person I am now. My children molded me into this person, and my greatest hope is that I can make them proud and return the favor.
So today I am sharing how Thankful I am that it was ME who was chosen to receive this gift.
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