Terrible, Rotten, No Good, Very Bad Day

Today has been one of those "Terrible, Rotten, No-Good, Very Bad Days"! From the time I got up, the phone was ringing from this office and then that office wanting me to do this and send them that. Emails started rolling in and then the phone calls and paperwork I had to do started up in full force. By the time Keith had to leave at 1:30pm I had spoken maybe three sentences to him, because I was busy with all of the people in the world who really don't count.

The ones who did got the short end of the stick this morning.

That makes me mad. Every single day the "demands list" gets longer. Being the parent to a child (let alone 3 children) with Special Needs is a lot more than just therapies and appointments and staying home with kids. There are mountains of paperwork that needs to get done on a daily basis. There are dozens of phone calls that need to be made every day. There are fights and arguments with different agencies.

There is little tufts of my hair scattered throughout my house.

I am a little exhausted with it all right now. On top of it all, we are hitting the Spring season. Our first Opthamology appointment of the season is coming up on Thursday in Maple Grove. I am nervous. I am actually scared shitless. This may be the year they want to do exploratory surgery on Bo to see if it is his muscles or his brain that is causing his eyes to cross. I want to tell them that they cannot do the surgery, but he has the chance of going blind without their help. I hate this part of being a Special Needs parent. Sometimes I just don't know what to say to hide the fact I get so angry at other parents. Don't complain about what you have! Enjoy it! There could come a day when you have to make awful decisions or actually be rendered completely powerless in the decision making!

I had a family member call someone a "tard" tonight on Facebook. I don't have any idea why I keep that darned thing. I get upset on a daily basis by people using inappropriate language one there. I used to think it was my social outlet, but if it is going to hurt my heart to be on there, what kind of outlet is it really?

On a stronger note, I have decided that if people do not want to let us into their lives, that is their problem. I am so burnt out on seeing people post picture after picture of Birthday Parties and Get-Together's, and knowing we were not welcome. It took someone basically telling me "who cares?" to wake up and realize... "who really does?" Everyday in our home is some sort of party. We laugh and have fun. We hug and kiss and give presents. We play and go do gun activities. Technically, we only need the people who actually want us in their lives. So I am going to turn a new leaf with all of this and begin a new independent journey with the kids.

I plan on popping a few new blogs tomorrow that dive a little deeper into these subjects, but for tonight I just needed a quick rant.

Thank you for listening :)